Just a moment of your time

[{qoou}DOS]

Growing up in the 80's
Dear Kids of America:

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year 'round blizzards carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full-time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from starving to death!

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way I was going to lay a bunch of shit like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it. But.... Now that I've reached the ripe old age of forty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so easy! Compared to my childhood, you live in a freaking Utopia! And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good you've got it!

When I was a kid we didn't have The Internet -- we wanted to know something, we had to go to the library and look it up ourselves! And there was no email! We had to actually write somebody a letter -- with a pen! --and then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take like a week to get there! And there were no MP3s or Napster! You wanted to steal music, you had to go to the record store and shoplift it yourself! Or we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and mess it all up!

You want to hear about hardship? You couldn't just download porn! You had to bribe some homeless dude to buy you a copy of "Hustler" at the 7-11! Those were your options! We didn't have fancy stuff like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal! And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either. When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was. It could be your boss, your mom, a collections agent, you didn't know! You just had to pick it up and take your chances!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics sucked! Your guy was a little square and in order to have any fun you had to rely on your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win, the game just kept on getting harder and faster until you died! When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! A tall guy sat in front of you, you were out of luck. And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only like 20 channels and there was no on screen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Did you hear what I said you lazy little freaks? We had to wait all week for cartoons! That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980! .....But I don't want to lecture you.

[{qoou}DOS]

Consumer Labels

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed

through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer

goods that can be found today being sold in stores nationwide:


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1. On Sears hairdryer:
"Do not use while sleeping."

(But..., that's the only time I have to work on my hair)



2. On a bar of Dial soap:

"Directions: Use like regular soap."

(And that would be how. . . ?)



3. On some Swanson frozen dinners:

"Serving suggestions: Defrost."

(But it's "just" a suggestion)



4. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):

"Do not turn upside down."

(Oops, too late!)



5. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

"Product will be hot after heating."

(Hmm . . . .)



6. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

"Do not iron clothes on body."

(But wouldn't this save even more time?)



7. On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this

medication."

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents

if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those

forklifts.)



8. On Nytol Sleep Aid:

"Warning: May cause drowsiness."

(One would hope)



9. On most brands of Christmas lights:

"For indoor or outdoor use only."

(As opposed to underwater?)



10. On a Japanese food processor:

"Not to be used for the other use."

(I gotta admit, I'm curious.)



11. On Sainsbury's peanuts:

"Warning: Contains nuts."

(NEWS FLASH)



12. On a child's Superman costume:

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

(I don't blame the company, I blame parents for this one.)



13. On a Swedish chain saw:

"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands."

(Was there a chance of this happening somewhere? . . . Good grief!)



14. On a bottle of Palmolive Dishwashing liquid:

"Do not use on food."

(Hey, Mom, we're out of syrup! It's OK, honey, just grab the Palmolive!

[Captain_Obvious]

lol - the funny thing is they have to include a lot of those labels, or you know some idiot would try to sue them.

[{qoou}DOS]

Yeah , like Special Kare

[Captain_Obvious]

exactly

[special_Kare]

Yeah , like Special Kare

its special_Kare.

small s u ass

at least spell my name right when u talk shit

[{qoou}DOS]

what u have a smelly ass?

[special_Kare]

what u have a smelly ass?

[{qoou}DOS]

[Captain_Obvious]

WHere's your trophy DOS? What's that? You dont have one?????? DENIED!!!

The special kid with the heart of gold has a trophy.

[{qoou}DOS]

[{qoou}DOS]

[Captain_Obvious]

It's good to finally see that some of the world's pirates are turning to god.

BTW - glad to see you've learned how to post images dos.

[{qoou}DOS]

Yeah i m a moron. Im just kinda clear headed right now